Whiskey And Whiskers

Cheeseburger Hangover

Grab a glizzy, a bag o' wine, kick back n chic flic. When the OG hookers retire, everybody's Y chromosome gets smaller. COLLEGE HuuTBALL!

Great Dane Gang

If you have TRex arms, you better have a Brontosaurus penis. Ray guns, and hydrogen car bombs.. i think this generation is F'd.

Figmint Barbershop Towels

We're using xbox reviews to create nerd-shit recipes. AI movies are coming, we're gonna have to head south to Canada.

Woo-Bros

MY NAME'S JD VANCE B*ITCH! F*UCK YOUR COUCH!

Million dollar Hurri-Caine.. That Nancy Pelosi's a b*tch.

There's no Football, but at least we got the Olympics.

Purge Your Grundle

Van Massages are better than burnt weiner sandwiches. Take your nascar to the Olympic rocket pull.

Cream of Chicken-Milk Bong-Water

SILVER ALERT: Buzz Armstrong and Neil Astronaut in a space shuttle. Last seen in not-space, near not-Mars.

Chocolate Drank

Degenerate diet: Steak, Whiskey, Cigarettes. Shake well before Climax. 

Punkd by a Skunk

They're serving s'mores noods at the Taco Bell Retirement community cafeteria. Don't smuggle snakes on a plane.

Brittany With Knives

Is a taco or a burrito? We're eating dogs and and blasting off prematurely. So clearly it's a chimichanga.

Residual Lion Jizz

Access to Axis in Excess might lead to chicken chunks in the chocolate fountain. That's still better than ham chunks in your notsrils.